Out of the comfort zone

What a day!! I spent four hours with Spade today so there is alot to tell.  Last night I told Danial that I was dreading going out to the pen with today, because I felt like I had not accomplished much yesterday. I wasn't really all that sure about what I was going to do with Spade today. I felt like nothing was really working. The inch by inch stuff was driving me crazy. As I was ready to go out to the pen  Mary Sollberger called and said that her and a friend wanted to come out and watch. Of coarse I said yes. Mary helped me get Spade settled in the first day and she was there when he decided to do the limbo under the gate, but she hasn't seen him in the last few days. As she watched me start, she was excited to see how much he was communicating with me and how much he was trying to let me in. She also commented on how animated he is.  That really lifted my spirits I felt like I have not taught him anything.

There is a part of Spade that wants to be my partner. On the other hand there is so much instinct that is telling him not to allow me in. In the beginning of the day we did the same dance that we have done the last few days. But as the day went on he slowly became more comfortable with me. I wasn't feeling like he was going to leap straight in the air at any given moment like I did in prior days. There was a peace in the pen. I started out doing what I ended on yesterday and in ten minutes was at the same spot I quit on last night. Although I wasn't getting any further. So I decided to move to a rhythmic swinging of my lounge whip. For some reason rhythm relaxes horses...not really sure why, but it kinda feels like you are fly fishing for a horse.  Even though I was swinging the thing everywhere Spade allowed me to throw it over his back, neck and around his front feet. He was concerned at first but soon relaxed. I decided to quit the morning session on that and went in for lunch but before I left I decided instead of opening his run to his stall so he could drink, I would instead bring a bucket to him. When I entered the round pen with my tiny purple water bucket you would have thought I just pulled a grizzly bear in with me. He bolted and started snorting like a bull. Running around like it was going to eat him. He had a funny look on his face and then he started toward me. This was the first time he has come toward me at all. But this time he wasn't coming in a friendly manner I put the bucket in the center of the pen and walked away as he rushed it!! Just as he was about to stomp it he froze....and realized it was full of cool water. After pawing at the bucket and giving it a good threat, he took a few drinks before he inhaled the entire thing.

After lunch back to the pen I went. This was my first day since he came that I had time to work with him without distractions. I quickly went back to what I was doing before and he easily accepted. For about an hour I did some other "at liberty"(without a halter) techniques that I know to change things up for him. I am sure he was tired of me, being the "socially odd horse", coming and sticking my body in his space the entire time. He did great learning the other things that I taught him. I now had full control of his feet and the majority of his body. I kept that control as long as his flight instinct didn't take over. He even started coming in to me a few feet when I would stop him. One thing that I started to realize is he would always stop in the back part of the pen. If I purposely stopped him at the front then he would work his way back around to the back again. I started to understand that he was making that his safe place and I was in less control there. It was like he had the upper hand in that area. I spent a few good minutes taking over that area of the pen and not allowing him in that area. Suddenly there was a respect that had not been there the last few days. (Wish I would have noticed a few days ago) After that it wasn't long till I could rub his whole right side with the lounge whip (just the right side, nowhere else). I started on the back and then every time I would move to a new area Spade would bolt, run around the pen, and freeze again so I could try again. He really was curious but also scared. I finally, after many laps, could rubbed his back, legs, rump, mane, neck and throat. Soon I was rubbing him with the whip and reached out and touched him briefly with my hand. Once he realized I was touching him he took off...ran to the center of the pen and rolled his lip as much as he could. I am assuming he was shocked that he let me in that far. It was pretty funny. I rubbed him one more time then quit.

So what did Spade teach me today....
 He taught me that we all have areas in our life that we do not want God (our trainer) to touch. We tell him "ok God you can have this area but not that." Or we hide in our comfort zone to keep God from stretching us into what we are suppose to be. God tries to pull us out of it but we keep working our way back in. We have to give God all of us, not just our right side or that area of the pen. As I talked to Spade all day I told him "if you would just let me touch you I would brush you, and bath you, and rub you...I promise you will love it. You can leave this pen and go eat grass with the other horses...there is so much you can do" Of course he didn't understand a word. How many times is God standing there telling us about all the plans he has for us but we just don't see the big picture and we run back to our comfort zone and wait until he calls us out again. If Spade would just have 20 seconds of courage and faith that I have his best interest in mind then we could do so much together. I feel like that goes for us too.