Don't Cram!

Today was bittersweet. I haltered Spade and we slid our way to the driest part of the round pen. He was extremely calm. Apparently the head lowering or the following me the other day changed his mind about me. He was really dirty so I brushed him. The whole time I was asking him to lower his head. He would lower it and then lift it a little. And I would lay my hand back on the top of his head and down it went. After two or three times he kept it at the level of my waist. As I brushed and rubbed I was telling him what I wanted him to learn today. I don't normally have long conversations with my horses but I figured that it was worth a shot. I brushed all of him today minus the back legs. I also grabbed his tail with the end of the stick without even a worried look. I needed to carry all of my equipment down to the arena I dared to think that I would get Spade to carry it all in one trip. He was so calm that I decided to go for it. What was the worst that could happen. I saddled him without a flaw. He didn't even back or give me a funny look. As I saddled I realized that I had to readjust the gear. Bummer! I thought it was going to be easy. That is why I was so shocked when he stood there quietly with his head low while I moved back and forth around him to get everything on him right. Then I did the unthinkable I put my lariat on one side and a halter loaded with long ropes and bridles on the other. There was a huge blob of ropes hanging all over him. I grabbed my long whip and the new packaged tarp and off we went. The only funny look I got was when we walked past the 4-wheeler he stepped to the side. He has never been crazy about that thing. He did not seem to mind about the extra 20 pounds hanging on his front. When we got to the arena I unloaded everything off the saddle and realized that I had forgot my training stick lying by the round pen. What?? My first thought was I will just work without it. But I really needed it to do what I wanted to do today. Then I thought if Spade were Manna my barrel horse I would just walk back down there with him and get it. So I did!
My goal was to teach Spade to lead by his feet today. This is a first for me. I was skeptical but I had three trainers suggest it to me for the kicking issues. So I figured I would start with the front feet. I wrapped my lead behind his knees and tugged. He backed up but I kept the pressure he stopped and accidentally stepped forward, I released the pressure. Before long I was pulling him around by his knees. Then I tried the front foot. He took to that pretty well too. At this time I was so excited. After all the pulling around I wanted to change the subject. So I started pulling the plastic off my new tarp, since the old one he shredded. He actually came up like he was going to help. He was very interested, right up until I unfolded it. He FREAKED! I then spent the next hour trying to get him to go over the tarp. He was no longer interested. LOL! I worked and worked I finally got him to put his front feet on it. By this point I was exhausted and he was pretty sure I was the meanest mommy on earth. It was super hot outside and I started felling myself get overheated. I knew I had to stop soon. Realizing that he wasn't getting any further today I started to drag the tarp back to the front. He was still very afraid. When I got to the front of the pen I sat down in the shade. My heart felt like it was going to burst. I got up and started to unsaddle. When I grabbed the back girth to undo it. He jumped and kicked his belly. Really??? I worked him in a circle and backed him up quickly. He licked his lips so I started to unsaddle again this time he was fine. I even put my girths away and he didn't move. So I went to go around him. He looked at the girths sticking out from the saddle and braced up. 1, 2, 3, BOOM! He jumped and tried to kick the saddle off. It teeter tottered on his back and then down it came. He nailed it with his back feet before it hit the ground. I started after him. Then I turned and grabbed the saddle pad and threw it back on. He wanted to kick again but decided that it wasn't worth it. I wanted to resaddle him and do it all again but I felt my body crashing from the heat. I sat down in the shade again and tried to get my breath. I knew I was in trouble. And I was really upset that I was sweatier then he was. I pulled out my phone and called Danial to come and save me. I was officially over heated. I wasn't going to get anymore done today. I left Spade there to play in the half dry pen and went to the house.
Once I got in the AC I started cooling down and I jumped in the shower. I was covered in mud and dirt . I started thinking about how I could have had a great day if I had taken a break after he did so well. I forgot that sometimes little is more. Instead I decided to cram more at him while I had the chance. In the end I would be lucky if he has anything to do with me. It made me think that this is very similar to a problem that is in the Christian world today. Right when a person is learning to trust the Lord some over overzealous church goer tries to cram what they believe at the unsuspecting person. Now before you hang me, hear me out. I believe that we as Christians should have the heart of Christ. Christ was interested in not his own agenda, but God's and he listened to God for direction. Today I wanted to cram Spade into doing something because I had a goal in mind and not worried about how he felt or what he needed. Christ always met the spiritual need of the people around him. All agendas aside. The Christian world has almost made it a challange to see how many people we can suck into church. Then stay deceived that we are concerned about the person. They come in and feel condemned then leave and don't want to return Mainly because there heart and mind weren't prepared by the Holy Spirit. There is a time for everyone to make a desion to serve the Lord. If we were truly interested in the person we wouldn't try to drag them to church. We would show them who Christ is through our words and actions. Allow them to make there own decisions and then they will find the church. Once you find the Lord you can't help but want to be with His people. I feel we as Christians should read a person and their needs just like I do my horse. If I tried to get on Spade today I can promise it wouldn't end well. But if I continue to prepare him layer by layer then when the time comes he will allow me to be a partner with him. Only then will my goal be achieved. That is my soap box for today. Remember that this blog is just me organizing my thoughts about my training and what God reveals to me daily through my work. Y'all are just invited to peek into my brain and heart. I love my God and my church with all my heart. This has just been an observation of mine over the many years I have been involved in ministry. Today God made me realize that I try to cram this poor horse into believing that I have his best interest in mind. But essentially because I am cramming, I do not have his best interest in mind even though I think I do. I am going to try to remember this tomorrow. Maybe he will trust me then.